


what's wrong with me?

by Set_Suna



Series: Pogtopia Breakdown [3]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Brief mention of all the Pogtopia boys, Emotional Manipulation, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, No Beta We Die Like Wilbur in Skyblockle, Quackity's got low self esteem, Schlatt doesn't help, Tommy does
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-27
Updated: 2020-10-27
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:33:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,158
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27230533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Set_Suna/pseuds/Set_Suna
Summary: Quackity gestured at the nearly bare shelves. "What's... What's here that's so important?""History," Tommy answered simply, picking up a book and quickly flipping through the pages before shoving it in his bag.Quackity turned on him and snorted. "Since when do you care about history?""Since Schlatt started erasing it," he mumbled. Quackity suddenly felt very bad. "I know you weren't around for the revolution, Big Q, but you saw us build L'manberg up from nothing after it.""Yeah," he whispered, "yeah I did."
Relationships: Alexis | Quackity & Jschlatt, Alexis | Quackity & TommyInnit
Series: Pogtopia Breakdown [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1986469
Comments: 15
Kudos: 503





	what's wrong with me?

**Author's Note:**

> brr hey guys I'm posting this before I have to go take a covid test so before the next part of this series I will say STAY SAFE!! also thank you to everyone whose read Techno and Tubbo's parts before this one and is keeping up shout out to you guys specifically I appreciate you because this does, in fact, have a storyline.

Quackity wasn't quite used to the Pogtopia life yet. Living in a literal cave was not something he expected to be doing. When Tommy found him having an existential crisis in the woods, he wasn't sure what he wanted. After somehow working through his feelings talking to Tommy, of all people, he'd decided he wanted to overthrow Schlatt. Schlatt was a horrible, horrible man. Being free from him felt better than anything in the world. He'd followed Tommy to Pogtopia not really sure of what he'd see.

A ravine was not it.

Coming down the odd, spiraling tunnel in the back of a dirt shack was a dramatic way to introduce him to the place, he had to say. With what little items he had and a new determination in his chest, he'd officially joined the rebels. He still wasn't completely used to underground living. It was always chilly, and sometimes the whole thing made him feel claustrophobic. On his first night, he didn't know it was late until Techno had passed his room and asked why he was still awake. 

That was the other thing: the awkwardness of passing so many people he had, until very recently, not been on such great terms with. Seeing Technoblade casually walk past him--no armor, no weapons, just a basket of potatoes on his back--still felt like the strangest thing he'd ever seen. He hadn't seen Wilbur since the day they rediscovered his control room beneath Manberg--L'manberg. He wasn't sure if he was even here. Niki usually asked him if he needed help with anything at least once a day, attempting to bridge the gap between them. He found company with Tubbo while the others were busy. They'd started making a map of L'manberg and all the tunnels running underneath it. Apparently Fundy had a secret base under the flag?

The most action he got was occasional scouting trips with Tommy. Techno didn't let him go alone anymore, after the whole horrible injury thing. Quackity understood. He'd helped Niki scrub the trailing bloodstain off the wall. He didn't like to think about it. 

Today, Tommy had called for his aid, since Techno was busy gathering materials for a new batch of potions. Ghast tears were a hard find. They took the tunnels that lead directly under L'manberg to Tubbo's no-longer-secret base. This place was often Tommy's goal. What he kept looking for here, Quackity had no idea. Digging through rubble and opening chests Tommy had probably already searched before, the question finally passed through his mind. He glanced up, seeing Tommy heading into the archives Tubbo had made. Quackity ditched his search to follow. 

The blond was scouring the remains of the shelves. It looked like whatever was here before had mostly been taken already. Quackity walked along the other line of shelves, only half looking at the titles. 

"Hey, Tommy," he started tentatively.

"What's up, Big Q?" Tommy replied, not looking at him.

"Why _do_ you keep coming back here? I mean, it's risky and... everything's practically gone already." Quackity gestured at the nearly bare shelves. "What's... What's here that's so important?"

"History," Tommy answered simply, picking up a book and quickly flipping through the pages before shoving it in his bag. 

Quackity turned on him and snorted. "Since when do you care about history?" 

"Since Schlatt started erasing it," he mumbled. Quackity suddenly felt very bad. "I know you weren't around for the revolution, Big Q, but you saw us build L'manberg up from nothing after it."

"Yeah," he whispered, "yeah I did."

They settled back into silence after that. Instead of dwelling on the heavy emotions in the room, Quackity focused on searching. There must be some good things still here. Tommy always managed to bring back something from these trips. He crouched and began to scan the lower shelves. Though there was nothing about the nation's history, he did slip two books into his things: a slim but tall book recording star charts and a shorter and thicker book about ghosts and demons. He had no idea why Tubbo had a book like that, but he guessed there was always time to ask. 

Getting back to his feet, he pushed against the wall to recenter himself. He wasn't propelled backwards, like he thought he would be. He was instead sent tumbling forward, passing through a pile of rocks that was much less sturdy than he thought it'd be. He coughed as the dust settled around him. He pulled himself out of the rubble and looked up.

"Holy shit," he breathed.

"Christ, Quackity, are you alright?" Tommy asked, coming up behind him. 

"Yeah, I'm fine, but, I think you're missing the important part," Quackity answered, pushing Tommy's chin up.

He watched Tommy stare in awe. He had stumbled upon the secret room Tubbo had built in his archive. Tommy stepped around him, gazing at the books that were somehow still here and still intact. Quackity followed him in, running a hand along the open pages. Reading a few lines of one of the books, his eyes widened.

"Dream's declaration of war..." he mumbled in awe.

"I thought this place was gone," Tommy stated, flipping through another book across the hall. "I couldn't find it, so I thought Schlatt had destroyed it, but... it's here. It's all still here."

"It looks like he just collapsed the entrance."

Tommy clicked his tongue. "Shitty job, Schlatt. So much for destroying history." 

Still in awe of their discovery, Quackity heard shuffling above them. Leaving Tommy in his reminiscence, he quietly left the room. The noise was more prominent outside. Someone was digging through a chest upstairs. Quackity slowly climbed the steps, sword at the ready. He froze in the center of the walkway. He probably stopped breathing. 

"What are you doing here?" Quackity asked quietly. 

Rams horns tilted his direction, revealing the face of Jschlatt. A smirk spread across his face at the sight of Quackity. He kicked the chest shut with his heel and strode forward a few steps.

"Oh, so someone is here!" Schlatt said happily, hands fanned out to his sides. "Big Q's back in town! Here to see the new monument I've built where that disgusting white house used to be, maybe?" 

"You didn't answer my question," Quackity stated, voice shaking. 

"Fine, fine... I just wanted to see what you were up to, that's all. I've noticed some things were going missing down here recently." Schlatt grimaced, disgust obvious as he looked down at Quackity. "I didn't realize it was bitch boy himself, or maybe I would've rat-trapped the place sooner." 

Quackity was fuming. He knew Schlatt was just trying to press his buttons. He knew that. It was working. The sound of running on stairs announced Tommy's arrival. 

"I've got all the books, so we should probably... leave..." Tommy slowed to a stop, seeing Schlatt before them.

"Oh, so the convict's here too?" Schlatt hummed. Quackity felt Tommy tense beside him. "I didn't know my basement had so many pests. I really should just destroy the whole thing, there's nothing worthwhile down here." 

"Why are you so insistent on destroying L'manberg's history?" Quackity questioned, anger seeping into his voice. "What gives you the right to storm in here and get rid of everything they built?"

Schlatt raised an eyebrow. Like what he just said was ridiculous. "What history? L'manberg was barely a nation. Now Manberg, on the other hand... have we got plans. That Dream guy? He won't even be a speck on our radar once we're done with this place." His gaze lazily shifted to Quackity. His smile changed to one of assurance. One of knowing he was right. Quackity could tell exactly what he was thinking. That Schlatt thought he was so much better than him. "And you? You'd may as well be dead. You'll never matter in the grand scheme of things."

In a flash of anger, his sword was pointed at Schlatt's neck. The man didn't react, just continued to smirk his direction. Quackity stepped forward, pressing the tip to Schlatt's throat. 

Tommy started, "Quackity-"

"You know this won't do anything," Schlatt interjected, smirk dropped and tone flat. "Killing me here changes nothing. I'll be back. In fact, Fundy and Ponk might just come runnin'. And then it'll be trouble."

"Quackity," Tommy tried again, putting a hand on his shoulder, "we should go. There's no use starting a fight in enemy lines with just the two of us." 

He hated it. He hated how much power Schlatt had over him. He wanted to end it. He wanted this pain in his chest to disappear. Still, he let his sword hand drop to his side. Schlatt straightened his tie and smiled placatingly.

"That's what I thought. As weak as you always were, Quackity, as weak as you always were," he jabbed. "I thought you might get a bit tougher out there in the wild, but, looks like I was wrong... I'd get out of here if I were you. There's no mercy in Manberg."

Quackity didn't start walking as much as start being dragged. Tommy wrapped an arm around his and pulled him from the base. He felt himself breaking. Each insult Schlatt hit him with was too close to home. Quackity knew he was weak. In comparison to the others in Pogtopia, he greatly fell behind. He didn't have the combat skills of Tommy or Techno. He wasn't smart like Tubbo. He didn't have the technical skill like Niki. He wasn't tactical like Wilbur. He had nothing. He was just Quackity. Nothing more, nothing less. What good was he for a rebellion? 

Tommy didn't let go of him until they were far from Manberg. They were practically back to Pogtopia. Still, Quackity's head was spinning. The rush of emotions left him feeling drained. Tommy had turned to put his hands on his shoulders. 

"Big Q, look at me," he said loudly, effectively garnering his attention. "Don't listen to Schlatt. He's just trying to mess with you and get in your head."

"I _know_ that, Tommy," Quackity sighed exasperatedly. He shoved Tommy's hands off of him and turned away. He walked a few steps and grabbed hold of his hair, tugging at it angrily. "But it's working! Schlatt manipulated me and used me and he knows what to say to get under my skin and it _hurts_ , Tommy! I was _nothing_ to him! I was a means to an end! I was his way into office and that's all! I gave him power, and look what he's done with it. He's ruined everything...!"

Quackity felt hot tears running down his cheeks. Tommy was blurry in his vision. He crouched to the floor, hiding his face in his knees and pulling on his hair slightly. Why now? Why in front of Tommy did he have to lose it? Everything _hurt_. He wanted the pain to go away. He was sobbing into his knees when hands broke his grip on his head and slipped into his own. Tommy had knelt before him. 

"Quackity, this isn't your fault," he told him, tugging lightly on his hands to get his attention. "We could never have predicted what Schlatt would do. He used you, you said it yourself. He's an asshole that doesn't deserve the power he's got. And we're gonna make him pay for all he's done. That includes what he did to you."

Quackity laughed weakly. He watched a tear drip off his nose and onto his sleeve. He cried, "How? What can _I_ do? You heard Schlatt, I'm useless." 

Tommy grabbed the front of his chest plate and pulled him forward onto his knees. He stared Quackity directly in the eyes and jammed a finger in his chest. 

"You are _not_ weak, Big Q. You stood up to Schlatt when you knew he was wrong," he argued, poking Quackity's chest roughly. "You've always defended L'manberg's history. You made the decision to leave. You stood up for yourself and that's the bravest shit anyone can do." 

He felt his lip quiver before the emotions really hit him. He quickly hid his face in his hands, elbows resting on his knees. He felt Tommy sit next to him and wrap an arm around his shoulders. The pain and anger he felt was eating away at him. Schlatt had made him feel like shit. He desperately wanted to stop feeling like he was worth nothing. He'd held everything in for so long. And it turned out the place he would spill his guts and cry his eyes out was in an underground tunnel to Tommyinnit. Of all people. 

Once he'd cried himself dry and knew his throat was fucked, he slowly picked himself up. He wiped his face dry and took a breath. His hands were shaking, but at least he could breath again. 

"Thank you," he whispered hoarsely. 

Tommy squeezed his shoulders. "Anytime, big man."

**Author's Note:**

> Schlatt's a meanie :( (BUT ALSO DONT SEND HATE TO OTHER CONTENT CREATORS ITS RP)
> 
> I appreciate any and all comments/kudos you choose to leave! 
> 
> You can follow my [tumblr](https://quibbels.tumblr.com/) for fic updates and my [twitter](https://mobile.twitter.com/quiblii) to see more stuff from me!


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